Some of the lucky guys amongst us are naturals when comes to girls and online dating. But in the main, most men will need to look at a certain strategy and technique when it comes to mastering online dating. Success in the world’s most competitive dating environment will take much more than good looks and brains. In fact, too much of a good thing has the potential to rail-road your online dating ambitions.
Any man who is considering turning to technology to find love should brace himself for a cold dose of reality because if he thinks that all it takes to become a seasoned online dater is to simply fire off a few messages to a couple of cute girls then he is destined to become yet another failed statistic. Men need to consider their options and do a little research into the online dating space before rushing off into the unknown with all guns blazing.
Online Dating: Where Girls Rule!
In a world that is largely dominated by men, the online dating game has its own set of rules, rules that are largely established by the girls. The average online dating site has around 65%-70% male members, meaning that the girls are a scarce commodity and can accordingly set the ground rules as to how men need to best approach them in order to rise above the noise. There are so many men using online dating sites that, from a girls point of view, it’s pretty much easy come, easy go – next.
Contrary to the belief of some, dating is not rocket science, but even if it was, men are wired in such a way that they will instinctively look to excel at it. There are 2 main reasons as to why men fail with online dating. Men overestimate OR underestimate themselves.
First we have the smart guys, the guys that excelled all the way through school and can talk-the-talk on just about any topic. The problem herein is that they are too smart for their own good, and are too eager to share their opinions and accordingly come across as arrogant and intimidating – women are turned off by such attitudes.
When it comes to overestimating themselves, the other type of man in the dating game who falls foul of this, is an above average handsome man that has the social skills of a bull-frog. They might be nice to look at for a while, however it becomes boring after too long, and his vanity sends off signals that he is far too into himself than to be into anyone else.
Then there are the overly-intense guys, the one’s that lay it all on way too soon! These types of guys often cross boundaries well before she is ready to let him in. Even though guys often start off with online dating with good and moralistic intentions, guys are renowned for asking for cybersex with girls they meet through an online dating site – a serious turn-off for many girls who just want to meet an honest and sincere man.
Establishing Your Presence with Your Dating Profile
Once you feel you’re ready to start connecting with other single people online, her online dating profile is the key to pushing those buttons that will make her pay attention and give her a reason to respond to you instead of hitting the delete button. Personalizing your approach based on her profile description sends her the message that you have taken the time and interest to study her dating profile, “So you’ve been to the Big Apple too?
What an amazing city, what other parts of the U.S did you visit during your holidays?” When you first initiate communication, by asking questions, you as far more likely to provoke a response. By appealing to her senses, you’ll likely get a reply and not end up in the trash delete pile with the rest of the guys.
As for guys who underestimate themselves, they more often than not have high IQs, decent social skills, although they sometimes tend to become overwhelmed when confronted with a real life dating experience or opportunity. This group of guys often become so consumed with not being over-confidant or arrogant, that they hide in their shell. And if this conservative approach reflects within your online dating profile, the girls will think you are simply too B-O-R-I-N-G.
The question still remains, what does it actually take for men to succeed with online dating? You can start by putting your best foot forward by being genuine, think of online dating as applying for a job, by making yourself a saleable item.
Your profile pictures, remember, you need to exhibit a fun, warm and adventurous side of you. Avoid using head shots where you’re looking straight into the camera. An online dating study by Today’s Dating revealed that photo’s of men who were looking away from the camera in their profile pictures, attracted more hits than studio or rehearsed type snapshots.
In the initial stages of communicating with your new online dating friend, avoid being too intimate, too detailed or too vague. You’re not authoring a new novel, so don’t get too carried away and over-kill the details. Rather, concentrate on interesting topics that you can both relate to – and use her profile to uncover conversation topics.
Here’s a final hint. Women love mystery and mysterious men. Try not to come across as too available too soon. Keep her guessing for a while, and she’ll be compelled to try and solve the puzzle.